#4 You Don't Know How All-Way Stops Work

I'm sitting at the corner, looking at that big red octagon that with white letters on it and the smaller rectangle underneath with even more letters, waiting my turn with low-level impatience and irritation, as that's about the closest I get to calm.  The cars to my left and to my right at the intersection go through, and it's my turn.  I start to go straight, but then YOU FOLLOW THE CAR THAT CAME FROM MY RIGHT STRAIGHT THROUGH THE INTERSECTION, forcing me to pile on my brakes to avoid t-boning you.  Not because I care about destroying your car, but because I'd feel compelled to jump out and set the whole pile on fire and as it'd be shaped kind of like a cross, people might think I was racist - I hate everyone equally.

What the fuck is wrong with you people?  All way stops are pretty fucking simple, and if you'd stop fucking it up, they'd be a moderately efficient and effective means of controlling traffic.

There's really only a few things to keep in mind about all way stop intersections (some of this shit gets a little bananas when more than 4 sections of road meet, but that's fairly uncommon, I think).

1. Emergency vehicles have the right of way.  No exceptions.  I almost didn't state this one, then I remembered that my dog's shit is smarter than the average driver.  Emergency vehicles always win.  Stop sign, stop light, middle of freeway.  The fact that you don't know this is most of why whatever deity you do or don't believe in hates you as much as I do.

2. First come, first serve.  Simple.  You get there first, you go first. That means if you pull up to the stop, and someone is approaching from another direction and is still a block away, YOU CAN GO.  Don't sit there and wait for them to stop while traffic piles up behind you, asshat.

3. In the event that multiple vehicles arrive simultaneously (more or less, don't be a dick about you getting there a millisecond earlier, asshole), the right most vehicle has right of way.  Don't understand this?  Stop driving.  But since you're not going to listen to that, do this to figure it out: When you pull up to the stop at the same time as someone else, look to your right (that means out your passenger window).  Is there a vehicle there?  If not, you are the right-most vehicle.  If the person who got there at the same time as you is directly across from you, yield to them if you are turning left, as they are the right-most vehicle as well in most circumstances.

4. If FOUR vehicles arrive simultaneously, yield the right of way first to:
i. Vehicles turning right.
ii. Vehicles going straight.
iii. Vehicles turning left.
Don't forget to go when it's your turn.  Don't be that retard who sits at the intersection while a half dozen cars cross in front of them.  Keep in mind that I don't think this point is actually a law (1-3 are), it's just common sense, something you don't have, so just trust me on this one.

That's about it.  I was going to come up with some scenarios, I even thought of drawing pictures, but then I thought I might get in trouble for filling my blog up with diagrams of cars full of actual cocks instead of people.

I hate you,
- The Angriest Man

#3 Your knee-jerk NIMBYism

For those of you who don't know what NIMBYism is, it's having that 'Not In My Back Yard" attitude.  It means that shit that you normally wouldn't care about, or might even encourage, suddenly becomes a big fucking deal when it's close to you.  You're like that, and I hate you for it.  You might be bitching about the main drag in your town being widened because you live near it, or complaining that the new shopping centre you signed a petition for last year is too close to your child's school.  Or, and this is the biggest one, you're probably bitching about economy-stimulating, environment-saving green energy constructions going in too close to your house.

What is your problem, anyway?  Not only will windmills and solar panels help the economy, lower our carbon footprint, and save everyone a lot of money in the long run, they also look cool as hell.  The only way they could look cooler would be when fusion energy becomes a feasible global option, and then they'll look even sweeter when they succumb to urban decay (broken shit is badass).

In conclusion, I hope someone builds a windmill in your backyard, and you're one of the possible 0.0000000001% of the population or whatever that actually has an adverse effect from it, and your head explodes or something.

I'd say I was sorry to disappoint, as this kind of crap doesn't raise my ire the way you do when you're on the road, but I figured I'd try to make myself look like I have opinions about stuff other than driving.  Not that I care what you think.

I hate you,
- The Angriest Man

#2 You Have an Inflated Sense of Self-Importance and Entitlement When You Ride Your Bicycle

The title of this entry pretty much sums it up, but I guess I'll lay out a few points.

First of all, bicycles are either lumped in with pedestrians and other non-motorized modes of transport (rollerblades, skateboards, walking), or they are vehicles like motorcycles, cars and trucks.  They aren't both.
Where I live, they count as vehicles, which means as a driver, I'm expected to afford all the courtesies to a bicyclist that I am for another driver.  I'm fine with that.
What I am not fine with is bicyclists who don't feel they need to return those courtesies.  When you ride your bike, you ignore the rules regarding right of way, you ignore the laws that say you belong on the road with the cars at all times, and you ignore stop signs, turning signals, and just about anything else.  You seem to think that when you are on your bike, the world must stop for you and allow you to ride down the sidewalk, through the crosswalk, in the wrong direction on the street, and make right turns from the left lane, left turns from the right lane, and straight from somewhere up in a tree.  I hope the next time you run a stop sign, you get hit by a bus.


I hate you,
- The Angriest Man

#1 You drive slower in the left-hand lane than traffic is going in the right.

I don't know if you're just an ignorant dick, or if you're actually stupid enough to think that driving in the left lane will get you there sooner no matter how fast you go, but there you are.  Driving in the left lane on a four or six lane highway, while semi trucks pass you at the speed limit on your right.  What the hell is wrong with you?

To make it even worse, you pulled out into that lane for no reason and cut me off, forcing me to pile on the brakes to avoid ending up in your back seat.

If you're going to drive slower than an 18-wheeler, get the hell out of the left lane.  That's the fast lane, or the passing lane.

I hate you,
- The Angriest Man

I Hate You

It's true.  I may or may not know you, but I hate you.  This blog is all about why.

A little bit about me: I'm in my mid 20s, and I'm angry.  I'm angry pretty much all the time, but I'll be at my maddest when I make posts on here.  They'll be erratic, and they'll almost always be negative.  If you don't like it, don't read it.  If I cared what you thought, I'd write a blog about something less offensive.

Stay tuned for my first reason that I hate you.  It will probably be something about how you drive, because let's face it, you're horrible at it.