#6 You are a self-entitled bitch of a soccer mom who is raising her children to be horrible.

I hate you because you are inconsiderate and self-entitled.  Today you set off your panic alarm to find your minivan in the student parking lot of a high school.  You are not a student at that high school.  You are not staff at that high school, though you lied and claimed you were.

Your van was parked about 100 feet from a portable classroom that was actively in use at that very moment.  Students were trying to learn and you blared a honking horn to find a vehicle you could see perfectly well from where you were standing and let it go for a solid two minutes, and when you were called out on it, you tried to lie and bully your way out of the sheer dickishness of your behaviour.

You also had your young daughter with you.  She is probably about ten years old, and she is watching your behaviour.  She is learning from you, and you're teaching her that other people don't matter.  She can do whatever she wants because it only matters that she has the most convenient parking spot.  Your lies about your job and your income are teaching her that money is power in the worst way possible, you are teaching her that because you supposedly make $96,000 a year (which was also a lie, unless you are one of the top paid of all secondary school teachers in the province), you can do whatever you want and talk down to people.

You are a piece of shit, a horrible parent, and you're teaching your impressionable children to be pieces of shit.  You are doing your utmost to make the next generation even shittier than yours.  I hope when she robs you in her teens because you've taught her that what she wants is more important than anyone else, it means your house gets foreclosed on and you have to live in the gutter like the trash you are.

Sincerely hoping you choke on a chicken bone,
- The Angriest Man

#5 You Use Your Religious Freedom As An Excuse Not To Say Thank You To The People Who Give You That Freedom

That's right.  This one pisses me off enough to come out of four years of blogging retirement.

I hate you.  I hate you because you're an ignorant clown who thinks that being grateful for someone's sacrifice is the same thing as condoning the situation in which that sacrifice was made.  I hate you for thinking that supporting veterans is supporting war.  I hate you for not standing up for your countrymen when they died, were injured, were mentally scarred, or changed their life plans so that you - not even born yet - would have the freedom to be an ungrateful shitrag.  I hate you because you have taught your children that God says you're supposed to act this way.

I hate you for having your child excused from Remembrance Day ceremonies, and I hate you for refusing to observe a moment of silence yourself.  I hope you exercise your freedom to play in traffic.  Get fucked,
- The Angriest Man

#4 You Don't Know How All-Way Stops Work

I'm sitting at the corner, looking at that big red octagon that with white letters on it and the smaller rectangle underneath with even more letters, waiting my turn with low-level impatience and irritation, as that's about the closest I get to calm.  The cars to my left and to my right at the intersection go through, and it's my turn.  I start to go straight, but then YOU FOLLOW THE CAR THAT CAME FROM MY RIGHT STRAIGHT THROUGH THE INTERSECTION, forcing me to pile on my brakes to avoid t-boning you.  Not because I care about destroying your car, but because I'd feel compelled to jump out and set the whole pile on fire and as it'd be shaped kind of like a cross, people might think I was racist - I hate everyone equally.

What the fuck is wrong with you people?  All way stops are pretty fucking simple, and if you'd stop fucking it up, they'd be a moderately efficient and effective means of controlling traffic.

There's really only a few things to keep in mind about all way stop intersections (some of this shit gets a little bananas when more than 4 sections of road meet, but that's fairly uncommon, I think).

1. Emergency vehicles have the right of way.  No exceptions.  I almost didn't state this one, then I remembered that my dog's shit is smarter than the average driver.  Emergency vehicles always win.  Stop sign, stop light, middle of freeway.  The fact that you don't know this is most of why whatever deity you do or don't believe in hates you as much as I do.

2. First come, first serve.  Simple.  You get there first, you go first. That means if you pull up to the stop, and someone is approaching from another direction and is still a block away, YOU CAN GO.  Don't sit there and wait for them to stop while traffic piles up behind you, asshat.

3. In the event that multiple vehicles arrive simultaneously (more or less, don't be a dick about you getting there a millisecond earlier, asshole), the right most vehicle has right of way.  Don't understand this?  Stop driving.  But since you're not going to listen to that, do this to figure it out: When you pull up to the stop at the same time as someone else, look to your right (that means out your passenger window).  Is there a vehicle there?  If not, you are the right-most vehicle.  If the person who got there at the same time as you is directly across from you, yield to them if you are turning left, as they are the right-most vehicle as well in most circumstances.

4. If FOUR vehicles arrive simultaneously, yield the right of way first to:
i. Vehicles turning right.
ii. Vehicles going straight.
iii. Vehicles turning left.
Don't forget to go when it's your turn.  Don't be that retard who sits at the intersection while a half dozen cars cross in front of them.  Keep in mind that I don't think this point is actually a law (1-3 are), it's just common sense, something you don't have, so just trust me on this one.

That's about it.  I was going to come up with some scenarios, I even thought of drawing pictures, but then I thought I might get in trouble for filling my blog up with diagrams of cars full of actual cocks instead of people.

I hate you,
- The Angriest Man

#3 Your knee-jerk NIMBYism

For those of you who don't know what NIMBYism is, it's having that 'Not In My Back Yard" attitude.  It means that shit that you normally wouldn't care about, or might even encourage, suddenly becomes a big fucking deal when it's close to you.  You're like that, and I hate you for it.  You might be bitching about the main drag in your town being widened because you live near it, or complaining that the new shopping centre you signed a petition for last year is too close to your child's school.  Or, and this is the biggest one, you're probably bitching about economy-stimulating, environment-saving green energy constructions going in too close to your house.

What is your problem, anyway?  Not only will windmills and solar panels help the economy, lower our carbon footprint, and save everyone a lot of money in the long run, they also look cool as hell.  The only way they could look cooler would be when fusion energy becomes a feasible global option, and then they'll look even sweeter when they succumb to urban decay (broken shit is badass).

In conclusion, I hope someone builds a windmill in your backyard, and you're one of the possible 0.0000000001% of the population or whatever that actually has an adverse effect from it, and your head explodes or something.

I'd say I was sorry to disappoint, as this kind of crap doesn't raise my ire the way you do when you're on the road, but I figured I'd try to make myself look like I have opinions about stuff other than driving.  Not that I care what you think.

I hate you,
- The Angriest Man

#2 You Have an Inflated Sense of Self-Importance and Entitlement When You Ride Your Bicycle

The title of this entry pretty much sums it up, but I guess I'll lay out a few points.

First of all, bicycles are either lumped in with pedestrians and other non-motorized modes of transport (rollerblades, skateboards, walking), or they are vehicles like motorcycles, cars and trucks.  They aren't both.
Where I live, they count as vehicles, which means as a driver, I'm expected to afford all the courtesies to a bicyclist that I am for another driver.  I'm fine with that.
What I am not fine with is bicyclists who don't feel they need to return those courtesies.  When you ride your bike, you ignore the rules regarding right of way, you ignore the laws that say you belong on the road with the cars at all times, and you ignore stop signs, turning signals, and just about anything else.  You seem to think that when you are on your bike, the world must stop for you and allow you to ride down the sidewalk, through the crosswalk, in the wrong direction on the street, and make right turns from the left lane, left turns from the right lane, and straight from somewhere up in a tree.  I hope the next time you run a stop sign, you get hit by a bus.


I hate you,
- The Angriest Man

#1 You drive slower in the left-hand lane than traffic is going in the right.

I don't know if you're just an ignorant dick, or if you're actually stupid enough to think that driving in the left lane will get you there sooner no matter how fast you go, but there you are.  Driving in the left lane on a four or six lane highway, while semi trucks pass you at the speed limit on your right.  What the hell is wrong with you?

To make it even worse, you pulled out into that lane for no reason and cut me off, forcing me to pile on the brakes to avoid ending up in your back seat.

If you're going to drive slower than an 18-wheeler, get the hell out of the left lane.  That's the fast lane, or the passing lane.

I hate you,
- The Angriest Man

I Hate You

It's true.  I may or may not know you, but I hate you.  This blog is all about why.

A little bit about me: I'm in my mid 20s, and I'm angry.  I'm angry pretty much all the time, but I'll be at my maddest when I make posts on here.  They'll be erratic, and they'll almost always be negative.  If you don't like it, don't read it.  If I cared what you thought, I'd write a blog about something less offensive.

Stay tuned for my first reason that I hate you.  It will probably be something about how you drive, because let's face it, you're horrible at it.